Darwinian Theory in the Restaurant Community

     Greetings and Salutations,


     First, the shilling. My latest piece on recycling and waste disposal can be found at www.ecoRI.org. EcoRI will also be a co sponsor (with Farm Fresh Rhode Island) of movie screenings at Local 121, beginning on March 30th. The first film in the series is "FRESH; the movie." It is billed as "Food, Inc." 2.0, focusing more on the solutions, rather than the problems of the food system in America. More on that later.

     Everyone knows that the economy stinks right now, but this downturn in the nation's financial sector could turn into the best thing to ever happen to the dining out public. 

     According to Darwinian theory, the stronger, faster, healthier and smarter animals are more attractive to potential mates, and therefore are more likely to procreate and pass on their superior genes to their offspring. If we think of a restaurant as an animal, and its food quality, service, policies, and practices as it's genes, it's customers as mates, and it's employees as it's offspring, we can easily apply this theory to the hospitality trade.  I suppose we could try Creationist theory, but much like applying Creationism to history, it just doesn't work.

     Let's say there are two restaurants that occupy opposite corners of the same intersection. The eateries are much the same. They are open for lunch and dinner, six days a week, the same amount of staff, similar menus, and a similar price point. 

     Restaurant A has a well lit, tastefully decorated and clean dining room and kitchen, a friendly, personable, respected and well paid staff, recycles what it can, and prepares its food in a creative and conscientious manner.

     Restaurant B has a poorly lit dining room decorated with sofa size art prints from the Venus de Milo "One of a Kind" art fair, windows that look like they haven't been cleaned since the Nixon administration, a staff that looks as if there are a thousand places that they would rather be, throws all of it's waste in one receptacle, and serves meatloaf that is more loaf than meat.

     Restaurant A has all the things for which it's mates are looking. Restaurant B, like the weak and slow witted animals in nature, has to use deception and trickery to attract mates (customers). This usually involves bargains, like a "two fer" deal, and coupons and promotions for free stuff, or gigantic portion sizes. But, who cares if the food is cheap or served in massive quantities, if it's barely edible, or cooked and served under less than sanitary conditions?.
     Restaurant A attracts many mates/ customers. It then passes on it's good policies and practices to it's offspring/ employees. Those employees go on to become the restaurateurs of the future, with ingrained positive notions of how to sustainably operate a restaurant, and treat their offspring/ employees equitably and with respect. Restaurant B dies quickly and without progeny.
     What I'm getting to here is the fact that, in these hard economic times, bad, and even mediocre, restaurants will flounder and fail, while only the fittest will survive. Which will amount to more and better options for the dining out public. So, something good may come out of this economic shitstorm after all.


Love, Peace, and Bacon grease! 

     

     

Misdirected Hostility! That's What You Got!

     Greetings all,


     Well, didn't I stir up a real hornets' nest with my post concerning the discrepancy between buying local produce and hiring illegal labor? I must be doing something right! Here is a response to that post, from the chef at the cafe in question, that I got in a facebook message. All names have been deleted to protect the innocent, and the guilty. The favor that is referred to was a loan of a quart of olives, which was returned five times over in the form of 5 pounds of fresh mozzarella cheese, the next week.




"so in response to the most recent favor I've done for you, I'm rewarded by you recommending no one patronize ****'s for lunch or brunch, potentially affecting the livelihood I and my family depend on.For this I say FUCK YOU. Once again your information is pulled from your ass and inaccurate, I chose not to comment at the blog site to keep it clean,as no one else has yet to comment, or perhaps even read the damn thing. You continue to be as self-serving and immature as you are, you'll continue to be unemployable and thrown out of bands. NEVER contact me again, stay away from my family and myself, and once again FUCK YOU."

     After receiving this message, I was stunned. Firstly, I never mentioned the name or location of the cafe/ bakery, and secondly, I left a proverbial "trail of bread crumbs" (pun totally intended) for people to follow to find out which cafe/ bakery to which I was referring. Really, who is going to play "DaVinci Code" to find out which local bakery has the most undocumented workers? If you do have that kind of time, get a life!
     I then posted the blog to my facebook page, in an effort to get some feedback on whether or not I was right or wrong in my assessment of the situation. Here are some of the responses I got on my facebook page:

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  in my opinion, yes,you are right!! and i voted for you too!
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  i think it sounds great .
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  there is nothing wrong with it
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  How could anyone even question it? If I have to pay taxes, every asshole out there should, too. Whether they are from this country or not!
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  I think it was a good article that raised some really good points - especially the one about the bounced paychecks while the illegals are getting paid cash. And really Dave, who in their right mind would leave a nasty comment to someone who can put that many beer caps on his head?
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  You were right on the money.
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  Right on!

     And I published the one anonymous comment I had on the blog, which was also in support!


     After receiving so much support from friends and readers, I thought it was only right to attempt to mend fences, after all, I did consider the chef to be a friend, and to clarify my position on the matter. So, I wrote several letters to the cafe in question, all addressed to the various legal employees that I knew were still working there. Here is a copy of the letter:

                I’m sure you’ve all heard from **** about my blog post, but here is the letter I sent him regarding my position on this issue.

                ****,

                 I know you told me not to contact you again, but I am writing you to clarify a couple of things, and in the hope that you will reconsider our friendship. I am still willing to go to any length for you, barring legal ramifications. You have always treated me with equity and respect, which is more than I can say for your employers. You may not think so, but I am on your side. Previous blog posts were references to **** and ***** though, admittedly, more veiled than my current post.  

                I believe that your hostility is misdirected. I never mentioned the name or exact location of the business, and you certainly didn’t respond this way to previous blog posts in which I did “name names”  in an effort to shine a light on the sociopathic behaviors that you and I have both endured as employees in the restaurant business.

                Surely, ****’s practice of hiring illegal labor, paying under the table, bouncing paychecks, and shirking his/ her duty as an American business owner to pay taxes presents a greater threat to your livelihood than anything I may print on my blog. Every time someone is let go or quits, there is always the issue of them being angry enough to call the ICE, the IRS, or both, and that is a dark cloud to live and work under. There are certainly more former ****’s employees with an axe to grind than there are people reading my blog, which you pointed out. I was that angry three years ago, but when I considered your livelihood, and the livelihoods of the other “above the table” employees, I decided not to report the many illegal and ill- advised things I saw there, and I don’t plan on ever reporting them the agencies in question. So, it’s really not me you need to worry about. I think you know that this is not a personal thing. I also think you know that ****'s reputation among former and current employees is less than stellar in regards to getting paid, unless you get paid in cash. These are the real threats to your livelihood.

                As far as my information being inaccurate, has **** stopped hiring illegal aliens and paying them in cash? Has s/he stopped bouncing the paychecks of taxpaying citizens? Has s/he treated you, ****, *****, *****, *****, and **** with the respect, equity, and pay you deserve for being a reliable and talented group of people? Moreover, have any of these things actually occurred to him/ her as problems s/he should be addressing? **** has also made his/ her business unsalable, due to the hidden monies and payroll costs. I don’t know of any lawyer, accountant, or real estate agent that will not see the bookkeeping discrepancies at ****’s during the process of due diligence for a potential buyer. So, if s/he ever decides to sell the place, it can only be to you, or someone else that is aware of the hidden costs that are not on the books. I would gladly swallow my pride and print a retraction if you could demonstrate that these morale and economy destroying practices have ceased, but I doubt that they have stopped. Maybe your time would be better spent trying to educate **** and ***** in the error of their ways, rather than ranting about a vague, not widely read, albeit accurate, assessment of the situation. But then again, in your own words, you’ve been, “… teaching them the same lessons…” for the last ten years. It must be exhausting.

                In regards to me being self- serving and immature, making the public aware of lousy and dangerous business practices is probably the least self serving thing a person can do. As a matter of fact, Ralph Nader has made a career of it. Why shouldn’t I warn people not to spend their hard earned money at a place where a large percentage of that money may possibly be shipped directly out of the country and the economy? Isn’t tax evasion for personal profit the most self serving thing one can do? Immature? My thoughts have matured to the point that I realize that the aforementioned less than legal, and less than charitable, practices are not sustainable, and it is really only a matter of time before some disgruntled employee “drops a dime.”

                Referring to me as unemployable is a cheap shot, and I’ve never been thrown out of a band. I was the guy who cleaned the walk in coolers, the dry storage area, spent hours chipping the carbon from the panini grill, and cleaned and organized just about any other area that needed it, without anyone asking. I contributed many excellent recipes for soup and other things (like the tofu marinades that you still use today), reconceived the calzones which decreased cost and prevented waste, and many of my ideas made it into seasonal menu redesigns. So, if being an employee willing to do whatever it takes, wanting to get paid a fair wage in a timely fashion,  expecting to be treated with fairness and respect, and being talented enough for my ideas to be on the menu makes me unemployable, I guess I am.

                I hope that someday you can educate **** and ***** on how they, and many other small business owners, are destroying the country. I think you’d have better luck teaching your dog to play the cello. Maybe this missive can be used to open their eyes. As a matter of fact, I’ll send a copy to ****, *****, *****, *****, ****, *****, and *****. I wish you and the guys nothing but the best, but in my opinion, that happens to be getting as far away from ****, *****, and their egos, as possible, before the karma wheel comes around.  I’m sorry to have lost a reader. Be forewarned! Without some type of acknowledgement or response, this all becomes blog fodder.  After all, I am now a writer/journalist. My email is **************.

In respect and admiration,

David A. Fisher

               I mailed those letters last Thursday. I still haven't gotten a response, or a subpoena, so I guess I'm in the clear. I really am sorry to have lost a friend over this. A friend who is a stand up, shirt off of his back, kind of guy. He's terribly intelligent and personable, and I will miss him............but I am right!

Love, Peace, and Bacon grease! 

Why Doesn't the Providence Urinal Print Bad Restaurant Reviews?

Hello all, and welcome back.

     As most of you know, I've been writing for the Rhode Island based environmental news site, ecoRI.org. In today's edition I have 2 feature pieces! I've also started the facebook group, "Stop Bitching about the New Facebook." So if you think that there are things in the world that are more worthy of your ire, frustration, and anger, go ahead and join. Other things to be angry about include: the death of health care reform, banks that received bailouts and are now hoarding money like Scrooge McDuck, or the increasing influence of corporations on our government (Thanks, Supreme Court!) We live in a time of "telescoping" technology, eventually facebook and all of your other faves will be changing by the second, if they haven't succumbed to obsolescence, so GET USED TO IT AND STOP WHINING!

     Tomorrow, the Providence Urinal will publish it's weekly food section. I like to peruse that section to get recipes (although they're usually not very good), find the latest last ditch adverts for restaurants that are rapidly going under (usually a buy one/ get one deal, or "we'll totally suck you off if you eat here!"), and of course, the crossword puzzle (which usually takes me about ten minutes to finish, and that's twice as long as it takes me to read the rest of the paper. Sheesh, what a rag!)

     Last week, after reading the restaurant review, it occurred to me that I hadn't seen a bad review in a while. Then it occurred to me that I don't think that I've ever read a bad restaurant review in our local "news"paper. My initial reaction was disbelief. Could Gail Chiampa, food writer for the paper, have never had a bad dining experience? How about Linda Beaulieu, former food writer for the ProJo? (Who my mother worked with at the Woonsocket Call years ago, incidentally.) Could she have gone all of those years without a bad dining experience? I mean, judging by the restaurant reviews, EVERY restaurant in RI is fantastic, and I know that's not true.

     I then talked to a friend that's been around the RI restaurant biz almost as long as I have.

     I asked him, "Have you ever seen/ read a bad restaurant review in the ProJo?" To which, he responded, "They don't print bad reviews."

      "What do you mean," I said?

      He responded, "If Gail (Chiampa) goes to a restaurant, and has a bad time, she doesn't write the review. She moves on to the next and hopes that it's better."

      I, of course, asked how he knew this. He explained it like this:

      A former boss had once told him this. Several years ago, a couple with a well established restaurant in Providence, decided to expand their Empire. This couple claimed to be the folks who brought the wood grilled pizza to the States. An immodest statement, to say the least. They opened a new venture in the heart of downtown Providence. Apparently, Linda Beaulieu, who was the food writer for the Urinal then, went to the new restaurant, was thoroughly underwhelmed, and wrote a scathingly bad review. When the review ran in the paper, the entrepreneurial  couple was disappointed to put it mildly, and absolutely BATSHIT PISSED OFF to put it accurately. Well, apparently, this couple has a lot of pull at the newspaper (read advertising dollars), they called to complain about the review and the paper hasn't published a bad restaurant review since. 

     

     I've worked in the business for almost twenty years and a review, good or bad, has consequences. A good review can give your business a great boost, and a bad one can ruin you, unless you take the review for what it's supposed to be, and that is, constructive criticism. Address the points in the panning, get better, and move on. Calling the newspaper and complaining is the equivalent of the schoolyard, "I'm telling on you!" Nobody likes a snitch. It's even more disquieting that the paper didn't stand by it's reporter, shoving her under the proverbial bus.

    A bad review is actually more beneficial to a restaurant than a good one because it gives the owners an OBJECTIVE VIEW of their establishment. It's hard to be objective when it's your pet project, but food writers are not there to serve as a restaurant's promotions manager. They are there to inform the public.

     It's sad that in an area that is as inconsequential as food reviews, we can't even count on objectivity from our news sources. If that's the case, can we really expect objective reporting on the things that really matter? 

     

     This is a blatant and unforgivable disservice that the BloJo is perpetrating on the dining out public.Shame on the Providence Journal and shame on Ms. Chiampa. Go back to printing bad reviews when you have them, and when anyone calls to complain, tell them to thicken up their skin, or GET THE F*&# OUT OF THE BUSINESS!

Love, Peace, and Bacon grease!

Vote for my Blog! It Won't Kill You! and Buying Locally, Hiring Internationally

Click here to vote for The Unhospitality Industry for the Phoenix's Best of 2010!

     This past Wednesday, I was the onsite correspondent for ecoRI.org at the 6th Annual Local Food Forum at Brown University. Over 200 organizations, businesses, and institutions were in attendance, and the whole experience lifted my spirits. There are so many people in RI that care about sustainable living practices, and molding a clean, positive future for our state, country, and planet. There were a few restaurant owners/ managers in attendance. Matt Gennuso the "tres" talented chef/ owner of Chez Pascal, and Derek Wagner, the innovative chef from Nick's on Broadway, to name a couple.It's fantastic that these restaurants are getting on board the sustainable movement, and I urge all restaurants in RI to buy fresh and local produce when it is available, which is all year long thanks to the organization of the Winter Farmers Market at the Hope Artiste Village in Pawtucket.
     But what good is buying locally, if businesses aren't hiring locally? You get what I'm driving at? Buying locally keeps money in the local economy. Hiring illegal labor, and paying under the table, usually amounts to money being sent directly out of the country, not to mention the lack of local, state, and federal taxes being levied on these cash transactions. Really, why bother doing the former, if you're also going to do the latter?
     Let's examine the differences between outsourcing, and hiring illegal labor and paying them under the table.
Companies that outsource jobs to other countries successfully avoid paying local, state, and federal taxes, and manage to pay people in those countries less than they would pay people in the States to do the same job. Hiring illegal aliens and paying under the table amounts to the same thing, although some of the money stays in the local economy, due to the purchasing of comestibles. So the differences are slim and none. I'm coining a new phrase here, "Domestic Outsourcing." It sounds nicer than hiring illegal labor, and shirking your duty as a business owner to PAY YOUR F*&%ING TAXES!
    I worked at one Providence cafe/ bakery where almost half of the help was paid under the table, citizens and non- citizens alike. Seemingly intentionally to add insult to injury, many of the LEGAL, TAX PAYING employees had to endure weeks on end of BOUNCED PAYCHECKS, while the less than kosher employees received ENVELOPES FULL OF CASH MONEY at the end of the week. I wonder how many of the restaurants and markets (including Dave's Marketplace, and Whole Foods) would continue to buy from this bakery if they knew about their lousy, culture destroying hiring and payment practices. Anyone who knows me knows exactly which cafe/ bakery I'm talking about, and anyone who doesn't, leave a guess on my comment board. It's pretty easy to figure out, go to the Whole Foods on N. Main St. in Providence and check out the bakery section. There are only a couple of Providence bakeries represented there. Then go to those bakeries and take a look around, you'll know which one I'm talking about. I urge everyone to not buy products from this bakery, or stop for lunch, (or brunch on Sat. and Sun.), at this establishment.Their commitment to local goods and produce is commendable, but their hiring and payment practices should be investigated by the ICE and the IRS.

Love, Peace, and Bacon grease!

My Latest Article for ecoRI.org and a Preview of Farm Fresh RI's Local Food Forum

Hello everyone,

Here's a link to my latest piece for eco.RI.org. You'll be shocked and amazed.

Also, tomorrow I'm covering Farm Fresh RI's Local Food forum at Brown University. The keynote speaker is Massachusetts native Gus Shumacher, Former Undersecretary of Agriculture for the Clinton Administration, and current chairman of the Wholesome Wave Foundation. Other speakers include Ken Ayers, Chief of RI DEM Division of Agriculture, and Noah Fulmer, Executive Director of Farm Fresh Rhode Island. Expect a blog post on Thursday on that, and much more.

Love, Peace, and Bacon grease!